It hurts getting ignored like that maybe its cuz I got drinks in my head but whatever I guess… Stare at the stars nd tear in the darkness of the night
Pathetic piece of shit that’s what I am
I love my uncle he left me some hidden rum now I’m going to drink till I passout the tomorrow I go to church at 7 play it off being drunk then I’m just going to drink my ass off till I can’t no more …. Fukit
I’m just going to disappear from the face of the earth right now . .
It always happens to me the min I leave everything fun happens … Maybe I just Fuking sick at life
I would do anything right now to have her in my arms
With everyday that passes each event it’s less and less of the things I wanted to do . . Together
I love you more then the very air I breathe
It’s amazing how much my life sucks
Lord stop punishing her it Fuking kills me stop please I swear god I will do anything for her please anything I swear
Why did I have to pry into her life such a beautiful and wonderful woman. I had to destroy everything with my demon hand demon thoughts demon soul. Maybe if my friend did not have that fucking accident she would not be suffering. Maybe if the memory of someone dead did not come back to me to haunt me maybe she would be smiling. Maybe if I wasn’t such a greed fuck she would be smiling. Instead she smiles with a tear running down her face wishing and hoping that she can forget all the sadness all the pain all the sorrow I fucking put her through. Not seeing all the good happiness joy we passed. Just because I knew what I wanted but I was stupid because of my old mentality of fear. Fuk my life how much I would give to make her forgive to make her happy honestly my life I would give for her. My heart soul and body belong to her. Yet it is still not enough. Everytime I hear I love you i always hear a small voice saying I hate you. God I don’t know how many nightmares I have had and don’t even utter. But if one bad dream does happen as long as she is happy I don’t care I would eat my pride. But my dream is to marry her. But if this continue I cannot but her through this no more. I rather die then hurt her again.